Black Friday…It’s named for the hope that retailers will end the year in the black instead of the red on their record books.  Yet, the name seems all the more fitting to describe the mood and behavior of so many who shopped on Black Friday.  There have been lots of stories in the news about Black Friday altercations.  No doubt tensions were high and I guess I witnessed it first hand.   I ventured out on Black Friday against my better judgment and happened upon an angry mother with two young children.  She was giving a Starbucks employee a piece of her mind for not pouring enough coffee in her cup.  She got so worked up she demanded to see the manager.    The employee behind the counter looked tired and frazzled and it seemed this complaint was about to do her in.

I began to get a little angry myself, at this ridiculous display.  In my mind I was thinking of how I would step in and take care of the situation.  I began running through options in my head:

A.  I would go over and tell the lady she was being ridiculous and making a fool of herself in front of her kids.  (I believe the others waiting would have deemed me the hero of the day and applauded my efforts since, by the look on everyone’s face, we all seemed to feel the same way about this lady.)

B.  I would go over and ignore the lady and talk directly to the frazzled employee.  I’d stand there and tell her although her day had been long and probably thankless, I appreciated her hard work.  

Or… I could go to the third option…This option is the one I call “other”.  It’s the option listed just after all of my options have been exhausted.

It’s like when you are filling out a form and A or B don’t fit so there is an “other” option.

  (Notice I didn’t say “c” because in situations where the word “other” is used, it is to describe something all together different from what’s stated in “a” and “b”. )

What I’ve learned is that God works in “other”.

When faced with everyday situations, I usually have a couple of ways I think I should handle a situation and then there’s God’s way.  It usually is quite different from what seems the obvious choice to me.

Let me give you an example. Several years ago my daughter, Abby, was being bullied at school.  When I heard about it, my blood pressure began to rise (call it a passion for justice) and I began to think of ways I would HANDLE the situation.  I would don my cape and TCB  – that means Take Care of Business.  I began to work through my options in my mind:

A. I would give this bully the evil eye when I saw her that would let her know I was on to her.

B. I would track down her parents and ask if they were aware that their girl is being hateful to others and offer them a book on parenting.

C. I would give Abby some good comebacks to really put this girl in her place next time she began bullying her.

Once I’d exhausted my ideas I was left with the option of  “other”.

I prayed and said, “God, I know you tell us not to seek vengeance.  I’m sure you also know that I don’t want to see Abby bullied in school.  If you don’t think any of my options are the best way to solve the situation…then I guess I want to hear yours.  What is it?”

His answer was a big resounding “OTHER” as I mentally saw it being checked in the box.

Guess what He said?

Love her. 

“Love her – this hoodlum child?  Love her?  God, I don’t even often see her.  How could I possibly show love to this girl?”  Why would I ever do something like that?!?!”

Have a sleepover. 

“Oh, God, that will never work. I would have to talk with her mom and I rarely see her mom at pick-up time.  What if her mother is as mean as she is?  Besides, what if Abby doesn’t like that idea!”

Silence.
“Okay, Lord, if you want her to come for a sleepover, there are some things to be worked out…

• Her mom will need to be there the same time I am at pick-up.
  
• Abby will have to be okay with this idea.

I left my concerns with God and moved forward that day with my plan.

Now, I’m not making this up.  When I approached the school door for pick-up I was shocked to find the bully’s mom right in front of me.  Before I could speak a word to her we both looked and saw the girls walking out together.   (Here’s where it gets really crazy.)  Abby pipes up and says,  “Mom, we had a talk today and we decided to be friends, can we have a sleepover?!?!

Cue Tammy…It was my turn to speak.  At first, I was tongue-tied, but I finally found my voice and said, “Well, since you mentioned it…” I turned to the girl’s mom and asked if it’d be okay for her daughter to sleep over.

She was a guest in our home that Friday night.   While she was over, we talked to her, showed interest in her and, for lack of a better word…just “loved” on her.  And guess what, Abby hasn’t been bullied since.

I know it’s a crazy story and this type of thing doesn’t happen everyday. The point I want to make is this.  As you are faced with frustrating situations and frustrating people this Christmas season, know that you can always choose the option “other”.   But remember, God’s option always involves love and loving others is not always our first choice.

It’s easy to say, “Let’s love each other.”  Especially when things are going our way.  But today’s blog is food for thought.  The next time you find your feathers ruffled, (long lines, heavy traffic, rude people, change of plans), as you’re thinking of how you will “handle” the situation…consider “other”.

Thinking back to the incident at Starbucks, I actually don’t know how things turned out.  While they were waiting on the manager, I was already heading out the door and on to my next “thing.”   I got into my car with “options” still running through my head.  As I thought, a still small voice said, “You could have tried love.”  It’s true.  I’ll never know what good it could’ve done.  But Love always “does good”.  Imagine the difference if we all would choose the option… “other”.

 My Cup of Tea

Today I want to share with you something I’ve used quite a bit lately.  Dry shampoo.  You know how you have those days where you don’t want to wash your hair but you are afraid of how it might look at the end of the day?  No body wants dirty looking hair.  Dry shampoo has actually given me a day of rest with hair washing.  It’s great!  I apply it right to the root of my hair mostly at my crown, temple and nape of the neck.  I let it dry for about 15-30 seconds and then comb through.  Another great use for dry shampoo is for body and lift.  There are many types of dry shampoo on the market and I’ve tried several.  I noticed that TreSemme’ does as good a job as any and it’s the least expensive I have found.  Those of you who comment on today’s blog will be entered into a drawing for your own TreSemme’ Dry Shampoo.

And the winner is…Kathy Matheny!!!  Chosen by random generator.  Kathy, please contact us with your mailing information and we’ll get your dry shampoo right out to you! 

 I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will empower you with inner strength through his Spirit. Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. (Eph 3:16-17) NLT

This weekend our family music ministry, Calling Levi, sang in Florida.  We left home Friday night at six, arrived in Florida on Saturday afternoon, set up, sang Sunday morning, left for home and arrived back on Monday morning at 8:00 am.  Talk about a crazy trip!

For over 20 years now I have traveled in music ministry in some form. (That would mean I started when I was three. Ha!) In fact, at home, I keep my toiletry bag packed at all times.  I’m ashamed to say that the suitcase I used for our summer tour is still sitting neatly in the corner on my bedroom floor filled with summer clothes.

Through the years I have stayed in countless host homes and hotels. It would be interesting to me to know how many.  All of this traveling affords us plenty of opportunities for hilarious stories we will someday share with our grandkids (many, many years from now)!  I have quite a few stories of host home experiences gone awry: awkward conversations, uncomfortable rollaway beds, dead squirrel in the closet.  I’m not making this stuff up!!!

That’s why the phrase “there’s no place like home” is all the more special to me.  I have done my best to make our home a haven for Mark and I and the kids. It has my signature on the decor and design. From paint colors, to wall art, to candle scents, my home speaks of who I am.  It’s a reflection of me in every way.

As much as someone might want to make me feel at home when I travel, it’s never like being at home. Their homes are just not like mine. When I walk into someone else’s home, I stand in the entry way and ask them where they’d like me to put my bags, I then wait for them to tell me what we’ll do next. I follow their cue in everything until it’s my time to leave.

God spoke to me during our trip this weekend through a passage in the Bible,

Ephesians 3:16-17 I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will empower you with inner strength through his Spirit. Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. (NLT)

Have I simply allowed Christ into my heart and life to stand at the door and await my cue?   Does he feel like a visitor?  This passage says to let him make my heart and life HIS home – His paint colors, His wall art, His candles, His signature.  I think you get the point.  If you’ve invited Christ into your life, into your heart, how do you treat His presence there?  Have you given him the “run of the house” or are you treating Him like a guest?  There’s a big difference.

I’ve been challenged by this illustration to allow Christ to “make His home” in me.  So that when people see me, they see His signature. His design.  How do we allow Christ to make our hearts His home?

• Get rid of the junk.  (You know – that stuff that’s hidden in the closets.  Things you don’t want to tackle.  Stuff you don’t want others to see. It’s gotta go.)
• Expect major renovations.  If my heart is to become His home, He will probably begin by tearing down walls, and restructuring the space as He sees fit.
• Remember to trust the Architect.  His resources are boundless.  He never skimps.  He only adorns our hearts and lives with the finest of blessings and goodness.  And He requires nothing from us but the willingness to let Him work.  The Bibles verse says He will make His home in your hearts AS YOU TRUST HIM.”

I can honestly say my heart is a work in progress.  The only time the construction slows is when I get in the way.  But I’ll tell you something…what I have found is this – When Christ is Lord, there’s no place like home!

MY CUP OF TEA -

I love coffee and I drink a bunch of it.  My husband, Mark, and I finish a pot each morning and are left wanting.  Okay, so I’m sure there’s plenty to say about too much coffee.  But it’s the truth in my home. We love coffee.  So, in the afternoon when the coffee pot is already in the dishwasher, I can still have a cup of coffee if I like.  My friend, Tara, turned me on to Starbucks  instant coffee.  And it’s actually great for being instant!  I don’t treat myself to it every day.  I just enjoy a cup when I’ve been in front of the computer too long or need a pick-me-up.  Those of you who comment on today’s blog will, of course, be entered to win a box of your own to try for yourself.  Hope you enjoy like I do.  It’s definitely my cup of tea.

AND THE WINNER IS…(I was supposed to announce the winner on Wednesday but I’ve been spending the past several days being Thankful!)  Lisa Kerns!  Congratulations!